The Writer: Her Confessions


Love for People


It is scary to reveal everything about yourself. You do not just blurt out all your secrets and expect everyone to understand you. On one hand, it does feel exhilarating to be vulnerable.

I am not here to reveal everything. But to satisfy this hunger for exhilaration, I am here to confess two things.

I am a Fraud.

There are things about me that I cannot fully believe are a part of me. Sometimes I deny it to other people and to myself. What makes it even worse is that, these things are not the bad things. These things are the good ones. And thatโ€™s why I feel like a fraud. Because it does not make sense. Because it does not fit in to my profile. Because you know, itโ€™s too good to be true.

Once, I told a friend that most of the times, I feel like I do not deserve the good things, I do not deserve to be great, I do not deserve to be loved. And when I do get to have the good things, to be great for a moment, and to be loved at the time, I dismiss the idea.

This was me before.

It was not healthy. It dawned on me that how you perceive yourself matters because it is how the world will perceive you. And it is important that it should not be the other way around. And so I decided to change my perspective.

Through time, I was able to embrace whatever the Universe has offered me. To not just have the good things, to not just be great, or to not just be loved, but to actually savor the moment of having it. To feel the ecstatic rush in my veins. To taste the sweet breeze in my face.

And to own the things that define me.

Accepting this, I had a breakthrough. Which brings me to my second confession,

I am a Great Pretender.

I said to myself, I can be any one who I want to be. And I believe, you too can do the same. We have this ability to blend, to cope, to adapt. And we have to use it.

We people are fluids and this world is our vessel. We shall flow, either naturally or with external factors. I am an external factor. And so I share to you my secret as a Great Pretender: when you want something, you do it repeatedly. You mimic it. You pretend to be it. Until you become it.

And then own it as if it was yours to begin with.

Hereโ€™s a few things I know about myself in those 24 years of existence (which includes the things I was born with and the things I made myself to be):

I am a Filipino. I speak four Languages (languages): English, Tagalog, Cebuano, Masbateno. My father is a pure Filipino. My Mother has a Spanish, Chinese, and Filipino blood. Funny how the Universe works because I am now in a Chinese-speaking Country (Taiwan) and I have always been fascinated by the Spanish Language (actually learning Spanish now).

I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am a friend. I am a lover. I am a singer. I am an Engineer. I am a student. I am a researcher. I am an artist. I am a traveler. I am a leader. I am a hiker. I am a runner. I am a dreamer. I am a writer.

And I am anyone who I want to be.

 

-k.

31 thoughts on “The Writer: Her Confessions

  1. inkyfire Reply

    I am fascinated here reading all about you and I agree to all the things you said in everybody’s context…. It’s good to know about you…. One most important thing that caught my sight is you and Spanish language….. I love that language … And I am trying to learn it too … But I am learning it alone and that’s being little difficult …. Just going on slow…. Anyway really enjoyed and have a good time ahead … !! Gracias por compartirlo !! ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘

    • dreamkatcherblog Reply

      Itโ€™s you again! Thank you so much for reading.:) Indeed, learning a language by yourself is quite hard. Itโ€™s better if you converse with someone on a regular basis for practice.:) My Spanish is not yet good. I think yours is better.:) Have a good time ahead too, and again, gracias!

      P.S. I just discovered I did not hit the REPLY button before ๐Ÿ˜€ Thus reposting my response to you ๐Ÿ™‚ I am new at this blogging thing. Hihi

  2. dreamkatcherblog Reply

    It’s you again! Thank you so much for reading. ๐Ÿ™‚ Indeed, learning a language by yourself is quite hard. It’s better if you converse with someone on a regular basis for practice. ๐Ÿ™‚ My Spanish is not yet good. I think yours is better. ๐Ÿ™‚ Have a good time ahead too, and again, gracias!

    • inkyfire Reply

      so i am able to follow you finally here – accessing your site through desktop – que le desea la mejor … siempre mantener la sonrisa y confesar sus sueรฑos por delante … we are all learning and it is something never going to stop till our last breath … You know – i think we don’t learn one thing in the end that is we died. ( ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ™‚ )

  3. spearfruit Reply

    Nice to meet you k, very interesting. Thank you for following my blog. I will certainly take time to visit yours as well. I hope your day is a happy one! ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. quiall Reply

    You have discovered a great truth! Thank you for following my blog. I hope you enjoy your visits.

    • dreamkatcherblog Reply

      Indeed! ๐Ÿ™‚ Thank you for following back. I am looking forward to your upcoming blogs ๐Ÿ˜‰ I hope you enjoy your visits too! Xoxo

  5. Brian Lageose Reply

    It’s good to meet you, Katreena. Your blog looks very promising, and I’m sure you will keep us interested as we both work our way towards being who we really are… ๐Ÿ˜‰

    • dreamkatcherblog Reply

      Hi Brian! Good to meet you too! Thank you for the visit. ๐Ÿ™‚ I will do my best to keep you guys “entertained” or perhaps inspired on each blog I’ll publish. ๐Ÿ™‚ I look forward to reading your upcoming blogs. ๐Ÿ™‚ Cheers to learning more about ourselves!

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  7. luyfitness Reply

    Hi There ๏Š,

    My name is Arita; I am a fellow blogger (luyfitness.com). I am from Hamilton, ON in Canada (near Toronto aka the 6 ..lol Drake reference). I recently opened up an Etsy Shop. I am inspired by brands like “Free People” and “For Love and Lemons”. My goal is to bring a little California style to Canada with my handmade items. My purpose is to empower free spirited women and spread positive vibes โ˜ฎI was wondering if you would be interested in promoting my tops! You can check out my items at #crochetbyarita on the gram or https://www.etsy.com/ca/shop/crochetbyarita. My fingers are crossed!!

    • dreamkatcherblog Reply

      Hi! I will come to think of it. ๐Ÿ™‚ I am still busy at the moment. And I am not sure how to put your items on my profile. I am a little lowkey when it comes to technical things hihi and also, I only have little viewers from Canada. So I don’t know if I will be helpful or not. ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. dreamymichaela Reply

    A good deal of personal insight in your ever-deepening discovery of who you are, Katreena. I thoroughly enjoyed reading about your confessions and the truths therein. ๐Ÿ™‚ I have learned some more things about you, including your affinity to and learning of Spanish. We also have that in common, amiga! I am excited and look forward to more blogs from you and the sharing of ideas and thoughts and dreams in this wonderful journey of life. Thank you for visiting my blog and for re-connecting and staying in touch. Always be happy and be love. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • katreenapillejera Reply

      Olah! Thank you for visiting and taking time to read <3 It is my pleasure to follow yours too! No better way to keep in touch in this world of media. <3 I hope to keep you entertained! Have a nice week, Amiga! Xoxo

  9. willowdot21 Reply

    Good for you , you are whatever you want to be! Thank you for the follow I look forward to reading your blog. ๐Ÿ˜‰

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  11. fitnessgrad Reply

    Hello,
    Pleasure to meet you and it was nice reading a bit about you as well. I wanted to say thank you for the follow and I look forward to reading more about you!

    Shay-lon

    • katreenapillejera Post authorReply

      Hi! Thanks too! ๐Ÿ™‚ It is my pleasure as well. Haven’t posted anything for a while already. But I will soon. ๐Ÿ™‚

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